My friend Blake has this thing he does with his girlfriend every Sunday.

It’s essentially a relationship check-in. 

A dedicated time set aside where they ask each other a bunch of – occasionally toe-curling -questions. 

Things like, ‘How could I have SUPPORTED you better this past week?’, ‘What do you want to EXPLORE sexually in our relationship this month’ or ‘What do you currently find LEAST ATTRACTIVE about me?’

Pretty savage – am I right? 

Or maybe it’s just because I’m British…. there again, so is Blake, so that’s no excuse…..

Long story, short. I am not mocking the idea. It’s actually rather genius, because wouldn’t it be a relief to vocalise those petty resentments, secret kinks or simmering unmet needs in a safe, Sunday-afternoon space?

Only problem I have…. or I’m guessing my husband might have…is that Blake refers to this little Q & A as their ‘Rituals of Connection’ (he lives in Byron Bay now…so, you know…’).

Anyways – It got me to thinking about my husband, men and how important the words you use can be.

Honest to God, if I suggested to Tom that we should start integrating a ‘Rituals of Connection’ into our lives on a weekly basis, he would run. For the HILLS. 

But maybe if I framed it as a game…. whoever loses this bet has to answer a question from this random list I found online… then he might go for it. 

You know, because it’s a GAME. And games are FUN. 

Better still, maybe the person who loses the bet has to be blindfolded. So, they don’t cheat and choose an easy question or whatever. That way they get to answer the toe-curling question with absolutely NO EYE CONTACT WHATSOEVER.

Talk about a SAFE SPACE.

Added bonus? If your suggested kink for this month was sensory deprivation related…then they are already blindfolded – You’re welcome!

You can obviously follow me for more awkwardly British relationship advice here & on my socials. Or you can download Blake’s free* ‘Rituals of Connection’ E-Book here and see if your relationship has the chops to handle it.

Need other ideas on how to speak HIS language?

You might find the stuff I wrote about ‘How to Communicate (Better) With Men’ (Spoiler alert – skip every, single detail) & How to Train Your Partner (and other useful relationship advice) also useful. 

I’ll keep you posted how I get on 😉 …..

This ‘GET HAPPIER’ post is brought to you by someone whose ritual of connection usually involves tacos. 🌮

#relationshipadvice #ritualsofconnection #menarefrommars #womenarefromvenus #thinrichhappy

*It’s only free for a limited time.