How To Stay Married (the new & improved version).

Some friends of mine recently got married and I wrote this for them – to read, remember and hang in their downstairs loo for eternity. I have been in a relationship with the exact same person for 25 years. This is what I have learnt.

Stay Funny – A marriage between two people devoid of humour, is no joke. Keep your sense of humour close at hand – believe me, you are going to need that shit. Big time.

Stay Cool – It’s hard to un-say things and women, God-bless-them, store up that crap up for years. So, take a deep breath and bite your tongue – it will hurt a lot less in the long run.

Stay Relevant – What works at the start, might not down the track. Embrace change, roll with the punches and don’t get left behind.

Stay Kind – I know people who are nicer to their pets than their partners. Kindness is a very underrated asset – use it lavishly. It tends to be contagious.

Stay Separate – Please don’t merge into just one giant ball of smug coupledom. Two people who do everything together, will never have anything new to say to the other. Plus, your single friends will hate you.

Stay Normal – When people have kids, they tend to get weird. Please don’t call your wife ‘Mommy’ just because she now is one. Please don’t start treating your husband like your less favoured child. Nobody will ever care about your kids as much as you do. Help each other – this stage is a doozy.

Stay Together – Being with the exact same person, for the rest of your life, is a fucking big ask.  But life can get lonely and there is something magical, not to mention downright cosy about sticking it out together.

Stay Hopeful – Even when things are ridiculously shit, remember that eventually ‘this too shall pass’ and if we expect the worst, but hope for the best, we will never be entirely disappointed.

Stay Grateful – If you have been lucky enough, to find someone who has seen you in all your glorious weirdness, and still wants to spend the rest of their life with you, do-not-let-them-go.

Stay. Decide to stay. It’s as simple as that.

This GET HAPPIER post is brought to you by someone who thinks the fight for the fairy tale is worth it.